2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
