hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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