oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
