I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
i would one night stand the shit outta him
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize