Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left an ass print on the piano.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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