sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
