You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
