The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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