Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
