it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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