FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
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All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
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Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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