I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
