theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
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