lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
