She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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