i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
