Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
