just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
