Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
