doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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