saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
