I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
