I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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