At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
