That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
