Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
