how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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