Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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