So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Can I color on your dick again?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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