You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
