Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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