i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize