if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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