i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
