i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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