Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
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