I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
