I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
