so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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