is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
