It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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