Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize
