Your tits are I can't wait for
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
