Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
