How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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