nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize