Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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