I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
