Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I just had sex on a roof
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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