I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
